marriage

marriage. While Buddhism regards the celibate monastic life as the higher ideal (see Celibacy), it also recognizes the importance of marriage as a social institution. However, in Buddhism marriage is essentially a secular contract of partnership in which the partners assume obligations towards one another. Unlike in Christianity, marriage is not a sacrament, and monks do not officiate at wedding ceremonies. They are also prohibited by the Vinaya from playing the role of matchmaker or go-between in bringing couples together. Nevertheless, it is customary for newlyweds to attend the local monastery (vihāra) later for a blessing and a simple ceremony in which texts are chanted. An early text from the Pāli Canon, the Sigālovāda Sutta, summarizes the obligations of husband and wife as follows. ‘In five ways should a wife … be ministered to by her husband: by respect, by courtesy, by faithfulness, by giving her authority (in the home), by providing her with adornments’. The wife reciprocates by ensuring that ‘her duties are well performed, she shows hospitality to the kin of both, is faithful, watches over the goods he (her husband) brings, and shows skill and artistry in discharging all her business.’ While monogamy is the preferred and predominant model, there is much local variation in marriage patterns across the Buddhist world. Early documents mention a variety of temporary and permanent arrangements entered into for both emotional and economic reasons, and in different parts of Buddhist Asia both polygamy and polyandry have been tolerated. Buddhism has no religious objection to divorce, but due to social pressures in traditional societies it is much less common than in the West. Western Buddhist groups, like the Friends of the Western Buddhist Order, have experimented with new models of community life without marriage, in order to overcome the perceived exclusiveness of the nuclear Western family unit.